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BRING THE RUKUS

A little over 5 years ago, I "feuded" with a Youngstown Internet radio station because they were lame and I had nothing better to do. I wrote an article about them for a blog I did on Valley 24, and they responded in kind by creating their own blog on the same site that quickly burned out after three glorious posts full of bugfuck insanity and tortured metaphors. Some weird glitch on the site has since rendered all of this old content unreadable, but the text still exists in the source HTML, so I've decided to replicate it here for your enjoyment.

Note: I discovered a bookmark to this old stuff today while cleaning out my bookmarks folder. Again: nothing better to do.

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What up Livejournal.

      

Where is everyone blogging these days?

DO NOT DISASSEMBLE

I should probably do something with this space before LiveJournal bulldozes my archives. Where would all of my old, shameful writing live without this blog? I vow to at least update my Something Awful Article Index, if only to chart the increasing irrelevance of my comedy writing. Thank you and good day.

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oh no

I let my paid LiveJournal account expire. Who cares?

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leaving tomorrow



This song always makes me think of journeys west and new beginnings.

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book it!

As you might know, I'm moving again; this typically involves me finding stuff to rid myself of before I am consumed by the horrors of relocating. Since books sell for jack squat on eBay, I'm offering all four of my remaining blog readers a bargain. You want any of these books? All you pay is enough for a padded envelope and Media Mail shipping. Just shoot me a memo at bobwmackey@gmail.com if you're interested, and we can set something up.

Oh, and anything not claimed by the end of Friday, May 20th will be donated to somewhere. Maybe a roaring fire. 

Here they are:

Paperbacks:

Dodsworth by Sinclair Lewis
Down and Out in Paris and London by George Orwell
A Handful of Dust/Decline and Fall (COMBO BOOK) by Evelyn Waugh
One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest by Ken Kesey

Of Mice and Men by John Steinbeck
Night Shift by Stephen King
And Then There Were None by Agatha Christie
Babbitt by Sinclair Lewis
Main Street by Sinclair Lewis
The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger
Lord of the Flies by William Golding
The End of the Affair by Graham Greene

Hardcover/Larger Paperbacks:

Burton on Burton by Mark Salisbury
I Drink for a Reason by David Cross
A Spot of Bother by Mark Haddon
The Talented Mr. Ripley by Patricia Highsmith
Eleven by Patricia Highsmith
Catch-22 by Joseph Heller
Some book about the War of the Worlds radio broadcast with lots of cool pictures and stuff

Just a note: Since I'm incredibly busy, I will send these things out at some point before I move. You may be waiting a few weeks.

Oh, and I'll be updating this as the e-mails (hopefully) start rolling in.

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a history of moving, May 2010 - May 2011

Photobucket

Don't cry for me; I'm already dead.

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me and the hodge

This has been sitting around in the "hey, you should probably put that on the Internet" pile for over two years--and I really can't think of a solid reason why I've procrastinated so much. Anyway, the video you will no doubt be compelled to watch is a recording of a chat I had with John Hodgman on WFMU's The Best Show around Thanksgiving of 2008. I think it's entertaining enough on its own, but additional entertainment value comes from the fact that this recording took place when I was knee deep in the trenches grad school, making sub-sub-sub minimum wage at a teaching position and generally hating myself and all those around me. Little did I know that grad school would soon release me into the wilds of year-long unemployment, where I learned how to catch, skin and eat various yard animals in order to survive.

But I'm much happier now. Enjoy!

I only have one real Christmas tradition, and that is watching Mystery Science Theater 3000 episode 521, "Santa Claus." It's not just one of the best episodes in the series; it might be the best episode of any series (this thing will be full of unnecessary hyperbole). I originally recorded the rerun on Mother's Day weekend 1996, the last year Comedy Central ran the show. Don't ask me how I remember these details; all i know is that for the last 14 years I've faithfully watched this episode around Christmastime.

You should also watch it. Santa Claus is on DVD, Netflix Instant Watch, and here:



I think Santa Claus Conquers the Martians is the more popular of the two MST3K Christmas episodes, but that's mainly because the movie has a weird Baby Boomer cult thing going for it. But Martians is dull and plodding and grating, even if it still makes for a funny episode. (Cinematic Titanic revisited it 16 years later and improved things a little.)

Santa Claus involves the titular hero fighting the devil on Christmas Eve for the fate of children's souls, and it's mostly carried by this premise alone and its inherent creepiness. And just like in Martians, Santa Claus himself is insane and bipolar and terrible at his job. Then it gets weird. Just watch it so I have something to talk to someone about.

At Least I Got a Candy Bar

The Onion A.V. Club has been doing a series of fantastic articles called Whatever Happened to Alternative Nation? which you should read if you were born in the past 40 years and have any interest in music. The newest entry is about the inexplicable popularity of alternarock-band-thing Live -- their name is apparently supposed to be pronounced like the verb form of the word "live" but I don't care. I'll dismiss Live publicly and live with the consequences.

Anyway, much discussion was had about their hit single "I Alone," which was a radio-friendly ditty that you could easily listen to with your mom -- provided she had some tolerance for empty angst. The video, on the other hand, revolves entirely around the unique premise of a bald, shirtless man writhing around and smooshing his face and junk while the world dies around him. Whenever I watch it I can't help but hear the sounds of Hank Hill being horrified somewhere deep within my brain: "Gah! Someone needs to tell that twig boy to put on a shirt!"

If you lived through the 90s, you probably saw this video at least 30,000 times. I know I did. But going back and watching it again some whatever years later, I can't help but be dumbstruck once again by Live's poor drummer, who, without his drums, is forced to wander through the video in a futile attempt to not look awkward. Granted, Live's frontman Ratboy Jr. sure can cause a distraction, but if you pay attention to the drummer through the whole video, you can't help but feel his plight.


 
Another highlight is when the second verse kicks in around at 1:22, when Shirtless McGoo realizes that his antics during the first verse will soon be seen by a worldwide audience.

But really, no analysis of the I Alone video is better than this one:

 

In closing: Hey, remember the 90s? *tosses jacket casually over shoulder*

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